i really do enjoy poems and literature writing.

I’d rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I’d rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far; for a might-have-been has never been, but a has was once an are.

~ Milton Berle

yes, you heard it right. a family. HUGE one, in fact!
we had our favourite guy hosting the event and even my GM sang a love song to honour his wife. to top things up, our Chairman also sang a few lines. as i sat there listening to the men sing, i can’t help but be thankful for this organisation that i’m in. it is not easy to find one which is family-oriented and one whose bosses are so down-to-earth!

one highlight of our lunch was an impromptu interview the host had with a 5-year-old Charis. we had a good laugh listening to her! details below.

enjoy!

the look of horror didn’t leave my face for the entire 23mins of the video.

g o s h .

Half Dome rises nearly 5,000 feet above Yosemite Valley and 8,800 feet above sea level, Half Dome is a Yosemite icon and a great challenge to many hikers. Despite an 1865 report declaring that it was “perfectly inaccessible, being probably the only one of the prominent points about the Yosemite which never has been, and never will be, trodden by human foot,” George Anderson reached the summit in 1875, in the process laying the predecessor to today’s cable route.

honnold took 2 hours and 15 mins to scale this monster. the first group of pioneers who scaled it took 5 days to reach the summit!!! ijustcan’tbelievemyeyes.

i’m inspired to start climbing again!

oh my gosh.

i went to youtube videos of him in research for my training content and i freaked out more at this next vid. *looks of horror* my gosh! this guy is GOOD! i have a new idol!

my babe tied the knot yesterday. i’m really, really happy for her!
not only she is my longest-standing friend (since primary 1), i also had the privilege of witnessing her journey with her husband. God is so good to them!

2011 has been a pretty eventful year. i hoped there wouldn’t be much repercussions but sadly, i was wrong. on the night we welcomed the new year, the Lord revealed my fear for 2012.

wow. 

as the first days of january creeped past, more unpleasant news came up. i found myself grumbling to my buddy about the people around me and the disappointment i felt when i think about the people in question. as soon as i realise the complaints, God also reminded me of His love for us in a paragraph from a book i’m reading.

in the chapter, the author talks about God touching the Untouchables. He used the story of the leper in Mark 1:40-45. from the passage, the author drew out 2 miracles:

1. the miracle of approachability – Jesus made Himself approachable and He chose to approach the leper (who is considered unclean and untouchable in those days)
2. the miracle of touch – going near to an unclean person is unimaginable…and to touch someone like the leper, it is scandalous! Jesus could have healed the guy by uttering words but He chose to touch before the words of healing were released. not only the leper was healed physically but his soul, which was tainted and bruised by years of shame and ostracization, is made whole

in regards to the latter, the author penned a sentence and quoted C.S. Lewis which caught my attention:

when you reach out to the untouchables in your world, you are signing up for pain. love means disappointment and heartache. (bullseye for me) but what is the alternative? C.S. Lewis wrote,

“to love at all is to be vulnerable. love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. if you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. but in that casket – safe, dark, motionless, airless – it will change. it will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. the alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. the only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.“

in an instant, my grumblings caused me to reflect upon 2 things -

1. doing it right - though not fully edifying, my emotions towards those around me are somewhat legitimate since i’m experiencing disappointment and heartache (according to the author)
2. am i willing to love? – tough question but pretty obvious answer (for me)

there were a few incidents (this week) which got me pretty discouraged. the more i thought about it, the more i can’t decide how i should be feeling towards the various incidents. yes, politically correct answer is to surrender to God but well, we are all humans aren’t we?

the words tough love came to my mind. these words brought a certain amount of comfort for my soul. if there’s one thing i did right (which i lacked doing in the past) this week, i turned my eyes to God. the fears and struggles, i surrendered it at His feet. have i fully succeeded in doing that? no. well, i try to.

love itself is never a bed of roses. the kind of love the world promotes doesn’t last…but God’s love is different. however, His love doesn’t promise a warm, fuzzy feeling in your body. in Hebrews 12: 5 – 13, it says,

And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:

“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”

 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

 Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. “Make level paths for your feet,” so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.

how i handle situations and ‘discipline’ others is a constant struggle of mine. i detest the fact that it makes me seem to rule with an iron fist and appear to be ‘heartless’. well, it is true that i don’t stand for nonsense. if i see something unacceptable (according to His Word), i will not hesitate to point it out.

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
2 Timothy 3:16, 17 

and i struggled because i wanted to be like my mentors…gentle and tactful. in the last month, i’ve finally learnt that i don’t have to live in the shadows of my mentors but to be who i am, the way God intended me to be. i may not be as tactful or gentle, but i try my best. i cannot control how others may compare, so long my actions and words are acceptable before God, i’m in the clear.

having said much, i know that i’m in the clear in regards to the recent incidents. perhaps, a little more tact to my statements but it was my best.

just want to encourage you with this:

if the Lord has put you to it, He will bring you through it. have faith!

goodbye for now. i love you.

well, happy new year peeps!
may 2012 be one which is fruitful and filled with joy abundant!

What Are You Doing New Year’s Eve?

Maybe it’s much too early in the game
Ooh, but I thought I’d ask you just the same
What are you doing New Year’s
New Year’s eve?

Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight
When it’s exactly twelve o’clock that night
Welcoming in the New Year
New Year’s eve

Maybe I’m crazy to suppose
I’d ever be the one you chose
Out of the thousand invitations
You received

Ooh, but in case I stand one little chance
Here comes the jackpot question in advance:
What are you doing New Year’s
New Year’s Eve?

as if it wasn’t enough, i had to deal with some special beings as well.
to set the record straight, i’m no fan of conflicts or confrontations (who does?). if i can always worm my way out of the latter, God bless me…however, that isn’t going to happen. when i interact with these people, i can literally see the walls of defense shooting up to the ceiling and “prickly person” alert is beeping on an all time high.

sigh. 

well, the purpose of this post is not to whine and gripe about work or special people in my life but rather…the power of the mind. one thing i am learning since my troubled days at work – it is to commit my thoughts to God. one tweet a friend made described exactly what i had in mind:

“The mind is like fertile soil. Able for good seeds or bad seeds to grow into its respective fruits! Think good! Reap good!”

by nature, my mind tends to swing towards the pessimistic rather than positive. i remember telling God many weeks ago that i want to learn to think good thoughts and praise Him intentionally in all circumstances. wow, it is definitely not an easy task! on hindsight, there is a significant improvement in my approach to work and people and which, i shall pat on my back for good effort made.

it is very easy to give thanks to God for all good things in life but when it comes to challenges, we lack the willpower to tune in with the same heart of thanksgiving.

i confess that today is one of those days which i find it hard to fix my eyes on the Lord. the mere thought of one special person got me spiralling down mentally and emotionally. this person didn’t even have to do anything and i’m already upset. it takes many constant reminders to myself that each of us are work-in-progress and not to be so hard on myself.

it is amazing to how our mind can programme our thoughts, thoughts affect emotions, emotions affect behaviour and if not careful, our behaviour may cost us serious consequences. i’m further convinced that we need to constantly and deliberately feed our minds with good seeds. think good, reap good! 

leave you with one of my favourite quotes from rick warren:

“No one can control your emotions without your permission. Who are you allowing to ruin your day?”

i had a nice christmas holiday – snuggling on the sofa watching movies, partying and catching up with friends, enjoying a cuppa on a lazy afternoon and etc… what would perfect my weekend would be some snow and a fireplace to keep me warm! *daydreams*

2011 has been tough for me but it is closing on a good note! will share more in due time.

p/s: i really love this picture!